The Faith Tones: "Jesus Use Me" LP cover

200810011126.jpg

I can't find this LP on the torrent sites. One sold recently on eBay for $21.

The Faith Tones: "Jesus Use Me" LP cover


Discussion

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New Desktop.

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Hey, don't laugh. An unholy amalgamation of those ladies just might be our next vice president. Curse you, Frankenstein!!

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how could any christ-like being refuse such an offer? use them indeed!

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There is no way, no how, that those are women. I refuse to believe!

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Left to right:

Brad Pitt(?), Buster Poindexter, Jay Leno

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That's photoshopped, right? Tell me it is. Please.

(it seems like their hairdos were added afterwards, especially the middle one)

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I agree about Buster Poindexter, but I think the left and right ones are Tom Hanks and John Lithgow, respectively.

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Mark, your posts frequently mock Christianity and Christians. (No I don't buy for a minute that this post is solely about the hairdos and the unfortunately worded title. You keep doing things like this too frequently for it not to be about Christianity.) How you must hate them; you sneer so openly and so frequently. It's also really hypocritical when liberal, supposedly open-minded people are anything but when it comes to Christianity. I thought this blog was better than this, I'm disappointed.

As an Apostolic Christian I knew I didn't belong here but for the most part I thought I could be left in peace- but this is getting to be a pattern, and it's getting really old. Whatevers- it's your blog, not mine! I know where the exit door is!

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Sorry, the third one is clearly a young Stephen Fry.

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>>#9 posted by jenjen

I was thinking Tom Hanks too, to be honest.

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Loving the hair-muts

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Lilorfnannie@10: "It's also really hypocritical when liberal, supposedly open-minded people are anything but when it comes to Christianity."

The old "you're a hypocrite for not being tolerant of intolerance" saw.

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#14 posted by JG , October 1, 2008 10:31 AM

Finally proof of the old adage, "The bigger the hair the closer to God!"

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Oh please, Annie, clearly you missed the science fair geeks photo spread.

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>>#10

Chill out, the hairdoes are hilarious, as is the double(triple?)-entendre of the title. Really, BoingBoing isn't serious business(ok, maybe sometimes)

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#17 posted by Paul , October 1, 2008 10:32 AM

@LILORFNANNIE

Wow, sensitive. Do you see anyone here going "ooo look, weird looking christians, that's what happens when you become a christian"?

Noone is attacking christians here, you are the first to mention it. The joks have mostly been about that insane 50/60s hair. The unfortunate title is the icing on the cake.

I suggest you watch/listen to Marcus Brigstock's clasic 7 minute talk, "Can the rest of us have our planet back", especially the bit about how not everything said about you is automatically an insult.

Youtube goodness: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UY-ZrwFwLQg

Paul

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#10 - Avert your eyes my brother! Let the hand of God whisk you away from this abomination!

Seriously, there is nothing derogatory in this post...other than your comment.

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#10 is right. We really need to treat this with the respect it deserves.

Carry on, then!

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So, three tranvestites want to be Jesus's rough trade? Groovy, I'd pay to see that.

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no way those are women. prankster photoshopping crossdressers maybe...

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The one in the middle looks like one of the kids in the American Funny Games.

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50's 60's? Women in Minnesota still wear their hair that way today. It's quite practical and handsome, don't you know?

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Finally, female counterparts to the Devo New Traditionalist look.

LILORFN@10: There is no need to mock when it does such a good job all on its own, and so have you.

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#25 posted by ryan Author Profile Page, October 1, 2008 10:56 AM

Are you sure this isn't just a still from one of those Tim and Eric Absolut vodka ads?

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#26 posted by Alan , October 1, 2008 11:01 AM

@ #10 - I'm a Christian, and I wholly approve the mocking of this album cover.

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The one on the right looks really disturbingly like old photos of my grandmother. But I think grams went more for the helmet-head curls than the helmet-head feathering.

Phew, must not be her!

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Okay. I am not trying to be some gender biased... whatever, but I also had this instant belief that these were men (before I read the article, I thought they must have been some modern alternative band Photoshopped that way for their quirky album cover. Wow.)

So as I tried to find out about the actual band, I stumbled upon a blog post written by a fan of the band. I had to include the excerpts I found most entertaining/puzzling:

I was a big fan back in the 60s, and played that album daily. I couldn't decide which one I liked best: Frances (the "cute Faith Tone"), Francine (the "pudgy Faith Tone"), or Franny ("the slut"). o_O

Rumor has it that Franny went on to become a successful Jay Leno impersonator in Vegas. It's probably not true.

Re: Franny, the rumor I heard is that she became Jay Leno. (the best is yet ahead)

You wouldn't think it possible to combine smoldering sexuality *and* worship but that's what made the Faith Tones special. (wait for it, waiiiiit for it)

I used to have a few more of their albums, in college. Their second effort was called "Come Inside Me, Jesus", critically well received, but not a but not a lot of takers. Another was "Oh Jesus, Don't Stop Now". O_O

I'm imagining that all these people could happen to be flawlessly sarcastic... But I can't seem to find any indication of that myself.

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I've been quite entertained and not offended in the slightest at pretty much all the posts called into question by #10 up until now, until Mark's response to her.......at what point did we decide that all christians are intolerant?

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#31 posted by Teej , October 1, 2008 11:18 AM

Can't...look...away.....

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I'm seeing Jimmy Kimmel in the middle there, betweet Tom Hanks and Steven Fry.

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I'm a Catholic and this is totally worth mocking, but Mark, I don't think this is about "tolerance of the intolerant" unless we're to assume that three ladies with odd hairdos singing songs about JC is necessarily intolerant. Falwell? Robertson? Yeah, intolerant. Three weird ladies doing their thing? I don't see it.

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@ 31 & 34

I think Mark was pointing out the fact that the #10 poster was being intolerant.

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#10 = Persecution Complex.

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I am a bigger fan of their follow up album "Jesus, come inside of me"

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Thought that was Peter Sellers on the right.

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powerpants@31: "at what point did we decide that all christians are intolerant?"

At no point.

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#10, it would be funny even it wasn't religious/christian, but the fact that it's got a religious bent DOES make it more funny. Asking anyone, especially a savior, to "use" you just doesn't have the ring it did 50 years ago. I've never understood Christians who claim they are misunderstood, when THEY are the dominant religious influence on American culture. Christians who feel persecuted have plenty resources and experience to get back at jews, muslims, atheists, gays etc. anyway, so have at it you poor WASP you.

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You guys have got it all wrong. The one on the left is Brendan Fraser.

And I've decided to be insulted at the intolerance of the intolerance of the intolerance. Please allow me to not be as intolerant as I would like to not be, but rather be as intolerant of intolerance half as less as I'd be willing to be.

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#41 posted by Anonymous , October 1, 2008 11:56 AM

Nothing in the world will convince me that the person on the right in this picture is *NOT* Stephen Fry in drag.

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#42 posted by Anonymous , October 1, 2008 12:01 PM

If that's Andy Kindler on the left and Stephen Frye on the right, then who's the guy in the middle?

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#10, did you see the Sonseed video Mark posted. It was not mocking. I'm listening to it right now. Zap. Much better than JC Superska.

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Bng tht gly s xctly wht drvs prsn t Gd.

dts.

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@10 I believe the exit doors are located on the far right and to your extreme left

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#46 posted by EH , October 1, 2008 12:27 PM

Kimmel for the middle is good, but I'm gonna have to assert "Brendan Fraser" for the one on the left.

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Intolerant? After looking at that album cover, I'm incontinent.

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Grandma? GRANDPA!?

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I kinda' wonder what they look like 45 or so years later...

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@ mark -
in that case, I apologize for misinterpreting your comment.

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That's Pete Wentz in the middle. And he really shouldn't go out without his guyliner.

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#53 posted by Anonymous , October 1, 2008 1:04 PM

Frances, Francine, and Franny?
I knew the regular music industry was "making the bands" by this time, but that makes me think the "unfortunate" title might have been deliberate.

As for the hairdos, yes conformity often is scary!

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I like how they match their jumpers to indicate they are part of the group, then express their individuality through their collars.

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@29 sekino:
Its flawless sarcasm, I hope to god :)

I want a mokumentary to be done about these "ladies"... Really bad!!

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David Lynch can only wish he could make up shit this weird.

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For those under the age of 30, I suggest that you take a good look at your high school graduation photo. Now look at this album cover. This is exactly how your children and grandchildren will view your graduation photo by the time you are 60.

I find it amusing that every generation thinks they finally have the secret to everlasting cool, and their fashions, trends, and fads will never go out of style.

You should mock now, with gusto. So you'll know what it's like when you are mocked later on.

Submitted with humility from a man who once wore bell-bottom jeans and a wide white leather belt. I apologize to any whose brains have just melted down at that horrifying mental image.

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For those under the age of 30, I suggest that you take a good look at your high school graduation photo. Now look at this album cover. This is exactly how your children and grandchildren will view your graduation photo by the time you are 60.

Not to argue, but my grandmother didn't look anything like these people.

And I already mock my own pics... pretty much regardless of the era.

So I keep laughing ;)

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This is for reals? Noooo, can't be. Men in drag, gotta be.

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Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble...

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Not to argue, but my grandmother didn't look anything like these people.

Neither did my grandmother. My mother wore her hair pretty much exactly like that. Perhaps not quite so high, but she wasn't in show business. The glasses are dead on.

I dunno. I agree it looks outrageous by today's standards, and funny. I LOL'd. But it wasn't that unusual by the standards of the time, just as our standards seem perfectly normal to us and will seem outlandish to later generations. So it goes.

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Tom Hanks, Eddie Izzard, Stephen Fry

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This has been said a million times before, but they just look like nerdy guys crossdressing.

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These chicks are personally responsible for 1/3rd of the ozone layer depletion due to excessive use of Aqua-net.

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Hmm, my maternal grandmother wore her hair long (in the 40's and 50's; I know, right?) and my paternal grandmother had a respectable, 30's style perm. I'm jealous of both those styles, thank you very much.

These are just...wow. Talk about spending twice your food budget on hairspray.

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#66 posted by OM Author Profile Page, October 1, 2008 3:54 PM

...Lessee, I could Xtian bash here, but I've got a better one: You see those quasibeehive hairdos? Well, believe it or not, they have a second use. They perform the same protective services for women that tinfoil hats provide for guys! They protect their brains from being scanned and mind-controlled by the Greys/Feds/Nazis!

[thinks]

...Hey, would I get banned from Boing Boing if I photochopped one of those beehives onto Xeni or Mark's heads?

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I'm not convinced those weren't cut and pasted from other (larger scaled) heads.

I just can't see someone having that much hair.

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#68 posted by quail , October 1, 2008 4:43 PM

Shellacked hair gives you the aerodynamics needed to walk through a Minnesota ice storm. My vote is that these young ladies were from the land of the north.

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I was screwing girls that looked just like that
in the 1960's that's when "the pill" came out.
By the way they look like Hassidic Jewish wives that
must wear a wig outdoors,I guess the wigmakers used
this cover as a guide,no offense meant by me on this
religious custom,just some humor.

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I'm not able to rationalise the physical volume occupied by the one on the left's hair. Is it combed over a partly inflated balloon?

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I've heard the words "Jesus use me" in so many movies now, but no-one was wearing clothes like that. Now that i think of it, no-one was wearing clothes at all.

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#72 posted by Anonymous , October 1, 2008 5:46 PM

Proof positive that people can "look" like an Ethel, a Myrtle or a Beatrice.

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LILORPHANANNIE#10 if you find that exit door, try not to let it hit ya where the good lawd dun split ya. a-men.

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#74 posted by Anonymous , October 1, 2008 7:18 PM

That's definitely Craig Finn from The Hold Steady on the right.

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#75 posted by Anonymous , October 1, 2008 8:04 PM

@Lilorphanannie #10: You! Out of my religion! You, and the oh-so-vocal "Christians" like you, are making us saner Christians look whiny, humorless, and extremely butthurt.

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i think i've left a moist spot on my chair....

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and also, those two on the right are drag queens.

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For some reason I feel compelled to watch some Kids in the Hall, I just don't know why...

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those two on the right are drag queens.

Excuse me? Drag queens wear make-up.

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#80 posted by han , October 1, 2008 11:40 PM

Come on, stop pestering LILORPHANANNIE#10. She's obviously distressed because she didn't think anyone remembered this old high school band of hers any more. And besides, this is a good, healthy way to channel one's youthful urges for Jesus.

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@60 Wigwam Jones - Well put friend. I tried hard to look stylish back in the 70's and cared about my appearance. However I bet that if there were photos that could be found I would look like the goofiest oddball around today.

When you look at them, I bet a "makeover" with a different hairstyle, clothing, and makeup they would look comparable to what we think beauty is today.

I too will keep an eye out for their record. Don't bid against me Mark. Maybe I could make an mp3 and upload it to the archive, as I bet that the copyright was not renewed.

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Recall post from Mark Frauenfelder back in June, featuring another trio of similarly coifed females. No religious connotations to that post, unless one searched for the tinsel-laden christmas tree in the back of the photo posted later in the week (http://www.boingboing.net/2008/06/11/girl-in-a-plastic-wi.html#comment-209935).

So, were the “Faith Tones” inspired by the “3 Play Wigs,” or vice versa?

Lack of punctuation between “Jesus” and “Use Me” lends to polyvalence. Would like to see “us,” from “Angelus Records,” incorporated into title (replacing “me”) and promoted in some sort of graphic form...”jesUS USe US.”

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UNICORN CHASER, FOR THE LOVE OF HUMANITY!

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KENEKE@40: ftw! (Now please explain to me what the heck you said...)

DBARAK@50: I'm sure they all have the same hairstyle, albeit gray, and wear the same clothes. Was this look ever hip, even for a nanosecond? If so, in what alternate dimension?

I think I'll stick to Jesus having built my hot rod, thanks.

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#85 posted by trstn , October 2, 2008 4:11 AM

Martians.. I knew they are among us.

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#9 Nice not knowing you.

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A great web comic for those that believe or don't believe in Jesus -- http://www.officialjesuschrist.com/main.php

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#28 Swaggert's cousins were Jerry Lee Lewis and Mickey Gilley. He was a man with much musical talent actually.

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The Faith Tone on the right looks like a young Stephen Fry...

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And that is why we had the hippy movement in the 60s. It was a rebellion for equal rights, freedom of expression, and freedom from shellacking your hair into unnatural and scary forms.

Also, Re: Offending the Christians...My Catholic buddy thinks this is friggin' hilarious. :P

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Yeah, Brendan Frasier Left...much better than Tom Hanks. Still sticking with Steven Fry on the right and Jimmy Kimmel in the middle.

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#18 My mistake, reply was meant for #9

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Full title of the title song: "Jesus Use Me (Like I'm Mary Magdalene)".

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Stephen Fry?! Peter Sellers?!?

It's OBVIOUSLY Robin Tyner from the MC5 on the right, kicking out the jesus jams, mothersuperiors!

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I have a small collection of these...uh, suggestive religous LPs. Here they are: http://www.flickr.com/photos/whitnuld/sets/981475/detail/

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I FIGGERED IT OUT!!! It's those three wacky brits from the BBCTV hit programme : "Top Gear"! Some crazy promo or somesuch.

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The only thing that comes to my mind is "The Exorcist".

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#100 posted by rad08 , October 2, 2008 2:53 PM

Has anyone mentioned the infamous "Let Me Touch Him" by the Minister's Quartet? Much more upsetting than this Faith Tones trio.

http://citadino.blogsome.com/images/letmetouch1.jpg

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SORRY FOLKS That's PhotoShopped check out the real photo here:
Jesus Use Me

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#102 posted by Sijay , October 2, 2008 8:03 PM

Agreed:
1. Brendan Frasier
3. Stephen Fry

Further nominations for 2:
- Eddie Izzard
- Bruce McCulloch

Discuss. If, at this point, you still care.

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#103 posted by Anonymous , October 2, 2008 11:36 PM

I posit that #3 = Mo Rocca.

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#104 posted by fcw , October 3, 2008 6:31 AM

Well, I see:

1. Brendan Fraser
2. Matt Damon
3. Stephen Fry

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Hey, those hairdos are a technological achievement. See the one on the left? You think it's easy getting that perfectly circular, uniform curl all the way around the crown of her head? As for them looking like boys, that's partly because they aren't wearing any makeup, and partly the result of an unnatural absence of sexual consciousness. I don't know where the pallor comes from, unless they live in Minnesota and the photo was taken in late winter.

Lilorfnannie @9, you've been a pain in the wazoo before, but this comment takes the cake. Fortunately, it's inadvertently amusing, which is a big improvement. If you're going to post again in future, could you please try to get the same effect? Thank you.

Hassan-i-Sabbah @28: That one needed a NSFW warning.

Keneke @40, you win. That should be embroidered and framed on the wall.

Avar1ce @44, try being inadvertently funny next time.

OM @66, it depends.

Chevan @67, Ladyfingers @70, it's possible. It just takes some doing.

Anthropomorphictoast @90, your moderator thinks it's a complete hoot.

Jane Kansas @98, good 'un.

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Christopher Guest, Michael McKean & Harry Shearer. It's an advert for their upcoming film lampooning the Christian music trade in the early 60's. Here's hoping it will be as big as Hairspray.

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#107 posted by Anonymous , October 8, 2008 12:49 PM

I can easily imagine John Waters having this kitschily delirious LP cover enshrined in his home. It looks like a girl group he'd feature in one of his films. And of COURSE they're all females. The one in the center is my Aunt Frannie.

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